Be still & know that I am God...Psalm 46:10

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Martha Stewart I'm not.....

I spent most of today working on my domestic “goddess” duties. Grocery shopping, cleaning, laundry, cleaning, cooking, cleaning, tending to sick children & ummmm…did I mention cleaning??? For all my effort, I look around me and everything still looks like a tornado hit it. ***Sighhhhhh*** Why is that??? I’m convinced there’s some evil invisible force working against me. How else would one explain the mystery surrounding the fact that 10 minutes after I clean a room it looks exactly like it did when I started??? How??? I really want to know. There are so many days I want to just say forget it. Let the dust bunnies have their way. Does anybody really have any business looking under my couch anyway??? So what if there’s dust so thick under there that you can write your name in it. Who really cares if there’s two tennis balls, a chewed up wiffle ball, three red dust-covered squishy balls, a chewed up bone (wondered where that got to), a Woody doll, 3 pennies and a reindeer ring. I mean really. Who cares! Obviously not me. LOL. I’ve kinda been on strike for the last…oh say two years. Figured if nobody else was doing anything, neither was I. Welllllllll, a lot of good that did me. Now I just have ten times the work to catch up on. Oh I’ve done “surface” cleaning. It’s the deep down cleaning and the decluttering (is that a word???) that I’ve been avoiding. Ryan wasn’t feeling so good today so he stayed home from school. Grocery shopping was his punishment (yes…punishment. He foiled my plans!). After we go back home and I put up all the groceries and fixed him pancakes, I started working on my bedroom & bathroom. An hour later, my bathroom was sparkly clean. As I stood back and admired my handy work….everything neat and in it’s place, I saw myself. No. Not in the mirror. I saw myself in a “catch all” pitcher that sits on my sink. And THIS my friends is the real point of my blog today. Not the fact that I’m no Martha Stewart. Obviously. This pitcher sits on my sink and has served as a storage container for all my little junk for years. I have a terrible habit of coming home from work, emptying my pockets and throwing everything on the sink counter. When I straighten up I’ll put all the odds & ends into this pitcher. There’s alcohol wipes, needles, band-aids, my raise (lol), and a million other little things. Well as I’m looking around the room and it looks so organized & together, I see the pitcher and it strikes me that that pitcher is me. That is what I feel like on the inside. No matter how well I clean up the outside. No matter how well everything is organized & no matter how together everything appears from the outside, I’m just a pitcher crammed full of mixed up junk. There are a lot of days I feel disorganized from the inside out. As Lisa Guy would say…..does that make sense??? And I’m not looking for somebody to say….oh poor Sue, she’s always seemed sooo together….who would’ve thunk it. Lol. Because truly I have no idea how I appear to others and I‘m not so sure I really care. What I do know is I think most people strive to look like they “have it” together. Some are just better than others at masking the truth. I laughed when I looked at the pitcher and saw myself. Why? Maybe because that’s who I’ve always been. A little disorganized and cluttered on the inside. I was a slob growing up. There Mom. I admitted it. As I grew up, I learned it was not socially acceptable to be a slob on the “outside”. I learned to shove things under my bed and into my closet.  I learned to hide my "mess".  A master of disguise.  And to this day I still do the same thing. I took some pictures of my linen closet and my cabinets but really…I’m too embarrassed to show them. Lol. Hopefully by the end of this week my house will be looking a little more presentable. At least the parts that are visible to the naked eye. Please….just don’t open anything or take a look on the inside. You’ll see how mixed up and disorganized I truly am. And besides….we might both get hurt when the ugly truth reveals itself. Lol. You see, the more things change, the more they really stay the same……

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